I get a call last night and it’s my wife and turns out the truck won’t start. She and my grandson are about half an hour away. Long story short, turns out to be a bad battery which in hindsight was giving me warnings now for a couple weeks.
So this morning there I am at seven to get it swapped out and turns out whoever put in the previous battery had put in the wrong one, and that could very well have been me. They don’t have the one the computer brought up in the midrange but did have the next better one. It took me probably about one minute to find out about the warranty differences and cold crank amps to decide to pay the extra forty dollars to get the next best one. There were other factors, time being the main one.
I made my decision and then while waiting began to think about how there was a time in our married life together when time would not have been a factor, money definitely would have.
When first married we had what was given to us. Within four months of being married Uncle Sam called and my wife announced she, these days we, was/are pregnant. After discharge, two years later, we started seriously our lives together.
What we had was a clothes line, not a dryer, not a color TV, but no TV, no phone on the wall, a series of cars, and I didn’t know a good mechanic because we couldn’t have afforded one anyway. Car repair and plumbing repairs, electrical repairs, washing machine, water heater, stove, anything mechanical, well those were my job as well.
Thinking on though I remembered that we always had a roof over our heads that didn’t leak, food on the table, three times a day and plenty of it and it was good, and because my wife was and is extremely cheap…but an amazing shopper, all of us had more than enough clothing and fashionable for a fraction of the price in a mall somewhere. Those clothes were always clean and pressed. The house was clean, orderly and in good repair.
Some couples experienced, experience much greater “hardships”? than we, some none of these, but this was our situation in part.
What we also had was the fellowship of family and a few close friends with whom we could spend time, who were willingly there to help us with a labor of body and equally willing to aid us in labors of the heart. And our financial status, the level of our standard of living was not a factor in their love for us. We had them and we had each other. “Things” were secondary.
I wish I could say it was all paradise but that wouldn’t be so. Both my wife and I are hard headed, easy to speak harshly, with feelings easily hurt. And there were times when we both said things that were hurtful and acted in a way to cause hurt.
We were believers but not with that seriousness concerning God’s will for how we should act towards Him and towards one another. That has come with time and we are still learning. It can be difficult to live in this world, experience its influence and walk in obedience to Yahweh’s Word and in harmony with one another. But God is faithful if we are, even when we are not.
That “difficulty” however, is not grounds for throwing in the towel. The difficulty should challenge us, not discourage us. Our natural response to it should be rebellion against it not a desire to run from it.
So this morning as I was waiting for a mechanic to do something for me and thinking about how fortunate I/we are that we can afford to absorb a cost we hadn’t counted on, for something as trivial as convenience, be it small or not, I was…well it may seem a strong word, but…overcome. I am… my wife and I are… blessed. And I’m thankful. Thank You Jesus, Yeshua, Father, Yahweh!
And I thought…how important it is in times of trials that husbands and wives experience, to look back, because in most cases two people came to love one another and decided it was with each other they wanted to be. They made covenant with one another, gladly, with anticipation and excitement. All of life was out in front of them and they were going to experience it together.
Two people came together for a reason, a reason important enough to vow vows to one another and live lives in faithfulness to those promises. Back glance can serve as a reminder of how it was in the beginning, serve, in critical times, as what might be a needed wakeup call so that they do not lose it…their first love.
Retrospection, looking back from the distance of time can remind us of how blessed we have been and inspire heartfelt thanks and point out to us that just because time has gone by and life seems to be different now, it’s not that we are different now and that that first love has lost its realness or power. It’s simply time to grow some more…with one another as our focus and discover together, what God has prepared for this particular season. It’s a time for exercising our trust in Him and His Ways, of proving His goodness in our lives.
The memory of hard times and hurt are now data for what not to do. The memory of what we did right, that proved love, now is more than just data for behavior, it is that gold with which we built upon the solid foundation of our love and trust in God and will withstand the fires to come.
Father, work in our lives for the flourishing and protection of our marriages.
Move us to focus on the good times and enumerate and focus on the good and loving attributes of our spouses and to put aside the temptation to see and be swayed by what we consider undesirable or not what we consider that which is needed or satisfying any more… do as You would do… remember them no more.
Bring to memory that time when our beloved was everything and remind our forgetful hearts of the joy that we had in the beginning and ring in us an alarm that drifting away we are in grave danger of losing it… through our turning away be implying… saying… that all that was turns out… is of no value after all.
May we indeed be alarmed and frightened that we could lose it…Father we pray.
Teach us to love Father.
And thank You Father for being the glue Abba that holds a husband and a wife together in all circumstances to an end that is good, just as it was in the beginning.
In Yeshua’s name we pray,
“I am my beloved’s and my beloved is mine.” Song of Solomon 6:3 AKJV.
May God’s love be in us all.